this isn't easy

So the last few weeks I've really struggled with nursing Avery getting good sleep cause she's waking up all the time, and be able to put her down cause she wakes back up with in minutes. I really thought I was doing something to cause all this or if I just kept trying things it would get better...WRONG! We went to the zoo last Tuesday and it all came to a head. Avery wouldn't take much from a bottle and then refused to nurse and was screaming for a long time. We had built up to this point and from then on til Thursday evening she really struggled to eat much at all.

My motherly instinct, exhaustion, and gut kicked in and knew something had been wrong and now it had gotten really bad. I called my good friend Barb to pray with me and offer advice. God immediately allowed me to relax and spend time praying about what to do next. Called the dr the next morning and sure enough when we went in she could tell by her symptoms and not much of a weight gain since last month, that acid reflux was the problem. She prescribed Prevacid once a day...I'm not a huge medicine fan, but knew that there was nothing else I could do to help her at this point and she didn't to get her nutrients and quick.

Avery is doing much better and we've put her in her carseat to sleep at night. She is able to eat to a full point now, with a few feedings a day that she has to stop and cry for a minute or two, but we're on our way to feeling better. It will take some time for me to recover from the extreme lack of sleep, but Matt and friends are helping with that tremedously :) THANK YOU!!!

These girls have taught me so much...scratch that...God has taught me so much through these girls. I'm learning that I HAVE to let go once again of the "control" that I so desparately hold on to and allow God to lead. I keep learning this the hard way!! He has blessed us with resources and a direct line to communicate and get answers from Him...I just need to learn that it's ok to get help and not always have the answers.

Avery turned 2 months on Friday and it does go A LOT faster with your second. She really is a sweet girl just not around feeding times but is getting much better and will continue to as the medicine gets in full tilt in the next few days :) She's smiling a lot now. Here's video for NANA with her smiling a little....Grace has to get in on the spotlight so I didn't get as much smiling as I would've hoped to.




Grace LOVES to help in all areas, but especially with Avery. She really likes to hold her and get a diaper for her(at any point that she thinks Avery needs one...or five). Grace is also learning how to be quite mischievous as well. These are the grapes she desparately wanted from the frig as I was getting a drink....I thought surely she was enjoying them in the kitchen while I was cleaning up in the next room...WRONG!!


There are lots of tough moments, but when you look into those precious little eyes and realize how blessed we are to have them and they smile back at you it makes it ALL worth it.